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anonymous: written
[Maron had been in Luceti for a long while now. For that long while, she had gotten the chance to experience things she'd never imagine at home, mainly the weird stuff that the Malnosso threw at people. She had formed some nice friendships, had a job working to keep her mind from missing Momokuri at Seventh Heaven, and was still keeping her mask on "happy."
However one thing had always been bothering her, even before she was brought to Luceti. It was something that, despite her own beliefs, defended to Masaomi around Christmas, and most recently, that speed dating thing. Sure, she had been there, with the mask on yet again, but what it was designed for...
People had been looking for friendships, people to date, people to love. That love thing was what had weighed heavily on her mind; it always had, though she was good at squashing the though, pushing it down because it wasn't real. It couldn't be. But why would people seek it out, why would there be people looking for it here of all places? Where someone they care about could be taken from them at any moment, seemingly sent home by the Malnosso (or some glitch that they'd overlooked for how long now?) The idea honestly baffled Maron, not one for too many close connections, save for two people over the years: Fin and Miyako.
Because of this curiosity, this need to know why people sought out something so elusive, something that she didn't believe to even exist--
She decides to ask. However, people might think it weird that someone doesn't know what the emotion of love is, or doesn't believe it exists depending on the person. So, she throws part of her bedsheet over the camera, effectively blocking out who is writing, and definitely makes sure the microphone is off-- it'll definitely be staying there. Her handwriting is nondescript (at least she tries to make it so) as to not give her identity away. Anyone can hazard a guess, though she'll have to be pretty damn comfortable to reveal herself to someone.]
What is your definition of 'love'? What do you believe it is, and why is it important to you?
However one thing had always been bothering her, even before she was brought to Luceti. It was something that, despite her own beliefs, defended to Masaomi around Christmas, and most recently, that speed dating thing. Sure, she had been there, with the mask on yet again, but what it was designed for...
People had been looking for friendships, people to date, people to love. That love thing was what had weighed heavily on her mind; it always had, though she was good at squashing the though, pushing it down because it wasn't real. It couldn't be. But why would people seek it out, why would there be people looking for it here of all places? Where someone they care about could be taken from them at any moment, seemingly sent home by the Malnosso (or some glitch that they'd overlooked for how long now?) The idea honestly baffled Maron, not one for too many close connections, save for two people over the years: Fin and Miyako.
Because of this curiosity, this need to know why people sought out something so elusive, something that she didn't believe to even exist--
She decides to ask. However, people might think it weird that someone doesn't know what the emotion of love is, or doesn't believe it exists depending on the person. So, she throws part of her bedsheet over the camera, effectively blocking out who is writing, and definitely makes sure the microphone is off-- it'll definitely be staying there. Her handwriting is nondescript (at least she tries to make it so) as to not give her identity away. Anyone can hazard a guess, though she'll have to be pretty damn comfortable to reveal herself to someone.]
What is your definition of 'love'? What do you believe it is, and why is it important to you?
written/anonymous
I'll still hedge a little.']
Come upstairs and talk. I don't mind.
written/anonymous
Her handwriting is still shaky, and she doubts she'll be getting it under control any time soon even if she tries (which she still is)]
I don't know where you live. I only know you, that's it.
[Maron feels bad for lying. Really, she does. But right now she's unsure she can extend her trust a little more to him. While waiting for Kyon's reply there will be a lot of thought on that.]
written/anonymous
...Maybe. I mean, it wouldn't be anything new. But on the other hand, there's that hesitation. And that handwriting. No, I definitely hit on something.']
I see. Well, I guess we could keep it here, if you know how to make a halfway-decent filter.
action
It'll be awkward as hell, though. But there's at least some comfort around him, so there's that.
So after some psyching herself up, Maron leaves her room and makes the trek up the stairs slowly, finally reaching the fifth floor after what seems to be forever. She hesitates once she hits the plateau, trying to decide after all this if she just wants to book it back down the stairs or if she should knock on his door.
After a deep breath and a mental kick in the butt, Maron moves forward to Kyon's door, giving a quick knock on it, and then she moves to put her back against the wall next to the door, taking in abreath and holding it.
Maybe he wouldn't look out around his door.]
action
It takes him a second to realize what it is, as unusual as it is to have visitors, or at least ones he doesn't see coming. Then he figures who it must be. He gets up and opens the door.
...And doesn't see anyone. Huh.
He waits a second or two.]
Uh... Anyone there?
action | god Kyon, such a stalker
So she exhales and finally speaks up, not coming out of hiding, so to speak.]
How did you know it was me?
action | IT'S ALL HE HAS TO DO OK
Just kind of sounded like you, I guess. The tone and everything. Not the handwriting, I wouldn't recognize that anyway.
...Do you want to come in?
action | stop being a hikikomori 8|
...yeah, I guess. Thanks.
[But even when she turns to go inside, nope not looking at him. Maron will be the one to make it awkward for herself about this.]
action | maybe you should drag him out
Next time, you can start cursing or something, you know? Just something uncharacteristic. But if you pick that now, I'll know too, so...
[ Fine, he'll turn away as not to observe her embarrassment. He'll sit down in his chair and let her take her choice of seat. ]
action | it'll happen at some point i'm sure.
[Sigh.
Maron will flop herself down across from him, thinking about everything as she does so.]
You said you didn't want to talk about stuff over the journals, so... here I am. I didn't think I was going to be talking to anyone face to face about any of this, so it's a little weird.
action
['Still trying to lighten the mood here.']
Right. Well... Honestly, I guess it's pretty weird for me face to face, too, but it used to be even more awkward before. I guess this is one thing I can say I've gotten better at talking about in the last... two years or so.
action
...talk about all this love stuff, or just in general talking to people?
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...And if you had to stop yourself from saying something like that, you probably were giving away more subtle things, right?
[Cough.] Love stuff, I mean. I don't really have trouble talking to people, but it can be a lot of trouble. ['Wait.'] I mean, a lot of bother.
action
[So love is trouble-- oh, no, it was retracted.]
Well I can't promise I'd be able to help with any of that, but I'll listen. Guess it means you have some sort of trust in me to be talking to me about it?
action
[And then the rest of it. Well, he's not sure exactly of what to say, but it's true he's more secure than at any other point in his life about this, and it's mostly driven by a crash-and-burn experience.]
Well, yeah. I trust you with my secret thief identity, right? This is a small matter as to that.
['Sigh. Not as comfortable as it seems, since my words are as limp as a ten-year-old tapeworm!']
Anyway, what I was going to say is that... Yeah. I'm not convinced I've ever been in love. Not in any way that I could say openly that there's someone that I can declare anything for. If there's any situation where it's been half-true, there's always been other obstacles in the way.
Does that make any sense?
action
[Maron still gives it good thought though, before nodding slowly.]
It makes sense, I think. I don't think I've ever really known it though, so you're more knowledgable than I am on this whole thing even if you've never had the whole experience.
action
So that's what I mean. I guess it's not love if it's not something you can actually pursue, right? Or maybe it is, but it really doesn't matter if you can't do anything about it.
action
I... guess not though, I mean there's liking someone because you think they're attractive [...uuurgh, awkward. There's some cheek flush over that one] and... I guess if it's mutual it could turn into it or something. Like I said I don't really believe it can exist, but I've never really had anything to change my mind on the matter.
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...And I guess that's how it usually starts. Not every mutual attraction [He hesitates a little] gets off the ground that way, though. It's not a recipe or anything... There's always other things in the way, right? That's why it's something you can't really force on yourself until you feel like something's wrong without it... or something like that.
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[Miyako. Minazuki. Fin. People (and an angel) that she missed sorely. Sure, she had made friends here, but having a connection to her home through them here would make this place easier to deal with on some days.]
But there are a few people here that I could say it would be weird without them here, if I had to deal with that too.
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...I know for sure under that definition, there are people that fit for me. But if you talk about it the way people define it, well, it could end up being anything. I just know that as far as romantic goes, even if it's had some of the right ingredients, it's never anything I could've said was settled. It's complicated. Personal relationships are complicated. Who or what a person is to you can be a lot of things.
['What am I even saying? Am I just repeating myself?']
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I should already know about all of this. I'm eighteen now, I shouldn't need to ask others what love is. I'm making you repeat yourself because I can't understand it at all. I guess I'm not supposed to get it. Sorry, Kyon. For making you repeat everything you've already told me.
[There's a sigh that follows that; girls were supposed to be all about princesses and true love, weren't they? All figured out how their dream weddings would pan out, who their ideal guy was... all of that still seemed so... weird. So not-right to Maron. Eventually she'll glance up at Kyon.]
Do you have a pillow handy? I might need to smother myself with one.
action
Well, maybe you just can't understand it at all because you've never focused on it or read manga about it or tried it yourself. You know? I figure most people pick up the obsession with it just because it's portrayed as the part of the victory condition in everything that people read. Maybe you just missed it. It's not a big deal if you did, though. Maybe there's nothing you're really missing out on after all. [He laughs a little awkwardly.] And if you do change your mind, you're cute enough that you'd be able to get whoever you want.
[He shrugs. Pauses for a second. Then fills the slightly awkward silence by tossing his pillow at her.]
But if you still want it, all yours.
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actionaction; hi i've been on hiatus and this comment makes me ship these two. damn it Linton! o9"